on Wednesday, January 23, 2013
O'Oh say CAN'T SHE SING. These are just two of the handful of other news headlines that I've already forgotten becasue some diva and 1/2 of a power couple (and may or may not be part of the illuminati) decided that she would take it easy on the presidential inauguration. So if you've been living under a rock and or have been dead the last week, you should probably consider adopting a new lifestyle - becasue hun it just ain't working for you.
The other guy I know who lives under a rock... not doing so well.
Also fun fact, Patrick Seastars address is 120 Conch Street. I know. Tell your friends. Get laid. Not in that order. So let's continue with the story...

My favorite niggarette flavored gum Beyonce (excuse me while I exclue that dumbshit accent - ain't nobody got time for dat) decided that she would go ahead and sing over a recorded track of our national anthem during Obama's second inauguration, January 21,2012 - Martin Lunther King Jr Day (totally the black illuminati). Apparently a lot of people aren't too happy with the decision and are pretty much chastizing her for doing the dirty deed. Now I'm not a journalist. I'm not going to go research and find some quote from the New York Times, USA Today, Playboy, or some other respected news media so just go with me when I tell you that people aren't happy. Also it should be mentioned that Kelly Clarkson or first American Idol victor did a rendition of American the Beautiful WITHOUT lip-synching it. She killed it. It was awesome, she's not getting any crap from any of this... just a whole lot of well deserved praise.
Keep flyin high girl. Mile high. Club. Mile high club. Please have sex with me.
So here's the skinny (which often at times is NOT Kelly Clarkson)... it's a cold day in Washington DC. I'm a multiplatinum CD selling, baby making, all star diva and I know I've been invited and asked to perform our nations anthem for our equally tan President on his inauguration day. I haven't had much time to practice with the band, I know my voice is gonna go outside in the cold, and let's just face it I don't have time for it. So, I do the next logical thing (and this is the detail everyone seems to be skipping) - I'm going to record MYSELF singing the national anthem and sing over it, just so I can eliminate the possibility of any error. Good job, me. Let's make another billion for the baby. Blue Ivy? Is that her name? Screw it, I'm rich.

Good story. I like the part where everyone makes her out to be some lazy, anti-american, she devil becasue she didn't have the gaul like Kelly Clarkson to potentially ruin our nations anthem on live television in front of millions of people. Woo. That Beyonce is a jerk. What? She isn't? Becasue it seems to me that she did the right thing, and she freaking sang the song herself anyway in a more controlled, not voice tearing environment. I don't see what the problem is. I think it was just a slow news day and since no one died from a shooting, people are gonna take the attention to anyone they want. We as Americans - no as people - have this undying desire to pin point every flaw on anyone we revere. So that we can prove to everyone else (but really just ourselves) that they are just as human as we are and sometimes we do what's best for ourselves. At least with this example she might have actually thought about us and decided to give us great quality singing by sacrificing a star studded performance. This wasn't a concert people - this was an inauguration - did you think she would be pacing left and right on stage? She wasn't here to entertain us, she was here to welcome Obama for whatever shit he does and to honor our fine (but broken and corrupt) nation with a played out anthem so we - as "proud Americans" - can feel better about ourselves as we carry out the American dream.

Think about what would happen if she actually sang it live and missed a couple notes or her voice craked? Imagine the slander there. She was in a lose-lose situation from te get go. The media is hungry for that kind of crap. They'll twist the story anyway they want to and they'll spoon feed it to our mouths and we will accept is as fact. I believe either way she probably did the right thing. Hands down.

And anyone who cares about the shenanigans that Beyonce pulled are probably in line waiting to get their genitals nipped by Washingon's wooden teeth. Wake the hell up, America, you're not that great.

His bark was worse than his bite.
ZING!
on Friday, December 14, 2012
Easily the best representation of Hurricane Sandy
I absolutely despise how it's been so long since this topic had to be talked about. I've had some major things to do at work and for now it seems like a good time to lay it all out, shoot the breeze. A strong breeze. Like 120 mph breeze. BOOM! Hurricane Sandy. Sweet transition, I deserve a prize. But for now all I get is more time to type, so let's get going.

My experience with Sandy was a little worse than everyone else around here, but certainly not the worst. I believe there are still people who are suffering the effects, and to them I wish them god speed and also a speedier recovery. So the Sunday before Sandy, I didn't even know there was a Hurricane coming. If it was anything like Irene (that two-timing bitch), I had already put little to no concern on the aftermath. I know that Irene beat up a lot of people, but for me I wasn't affected so much so I guess Sandy took the time to adjust karma levels. I was actually working the very last shift I would ever have at CVS. Your basic 9-5, and I stayed an extra hour because of all the hurricane hustle and bustle, and also the new Pharmacist was still getting used to the flow of the store. 6 o'clock came running along and you could see the skies getting dark and the wind picking up. I had realized there was in fact a hurricane coming. Still scoffed at how weak it was though (this might have been my demise). Driving down the parkway, it was darker than usual at the time of day so I picked up speed, got home, and snuggled up nicely in my bed. Since Irene gave a double dose of paranoia to the east coast, classes and work had already been cancelled. I slept soundly that night knowing I could sleep in, and only woke up a couple times to the sound of strong (but not that strong) wind.

Monday morning came and power still here. I took a look outside my bedroom window and everything seemed to be ok. Lots of leaves on the ground, the weak lawn ornaments were knocked down. Still had power. It was great. By then I was also under the impression that Sandy would roll on through Sunday and Monday. Didn't know it would kind of peak into Tuesday as well. With that in mind I made some preparations to potentially be off another day and just RELAXED my butt off. I was in the middle of playing Kirby with my sister when it happened. The flicker, the dimming lights. BOOM. It had begun. My life in darkness.
Pictured: DARKNESS
It was about 1 PM when the lights went. I still had the rest of the natural sunlight before nightfall. The family gathered the flashlights and candles, I readied the blankets. Power saving options were made for phones, iPads, and hand held video games. It was like planning for war. I recall having a big lunch so I could get through dinner. By the time night came, the real tests of courage and wit were initiated. The first night was ok, just your regular average every day night without power. A good nights rest and the power would be back on the next day...

Except it wasn't. Day two was still ok, a haircut earlier in the month didn't allow my hair to get too oily too quickly. There wasn't much movement, so no sweating occurred. Just stayed in bed all day playing our handhelds, dozing off every once in awhile. Getting up to eat was something to get used to, even on day two. Leftovers were eaten cold, and food as prepared with the intent of being served cold. This is where the family started to worry about our situation. I was still under the influence of "we'll get the power back soon," but my family had already started seeing what could and could not be eaten within the next couple days. Without power, no fridge. No fridge, less food - spoiled food. Lucky for us we have a gas stove, so we fried up as much of the meat we could. That was all the cooking that was done for today. We couldn't cook after nightfall.

When the time came, everyone gathered around and lit candles. I decided to start a new file of Ocarina of Time. Being in bed all day meant hours of playing through the night. Actually I believe I just got the first three stones before the whole "staring at light in the dark makes you tired" kind of thing. Day 3 was more or less the same thing. Bed all day, cold food, no shower, playing video games. Luckily for my parents they still had to work so they could escape the prison that was now my own home. What's worse is that phones started to die, and handhelds were soon starting to go also. It was later on that day that I probably realized that we were in this for the long run.

Day four was a relief. After days of no showering, we had come into contact with some family who had no power, but hot water. So sis and I (mom had been showering at work, and dad was too busy working) made it our business to get on over there and take advantage of the situation. Driving there was like driving through a different world. Trees and lines fallen, leaves EVERYWHERE, and really no one in sight. It was like Ichabod Crane and the Great Pumpkin from Charlie Brown had a mud wrestling match while the cast of Angry Beavers filmed using equipment made of wood. Also Whispy Woods was the referee.

 After a well deserved shower by the candle light, we stuck around enjoying the company of other family as the day went away. We indulged in some ramen, card games, and good times. It really leaked the stress out, and made they day go by way faster. By nightfall sis and I were on our way back, to misery... and darkness. By this time we were kind of living on day to day updates about university closings and work closings... day five was kind of the "ok we're probably going to be out the rest of the week type update." That morning we had needed another shower. We certainly weren't going to drive the distance we had yesterday, but we found that our other cousin who lives much closer also had hot water, but no power. So we took it upon ourselves to go there, spend some more time with family. This was a shower by flashlight, which was a good change of pace, and afterwards we got to talking about gas prices.

Apparently, it had gotten to the point where people were so gas hungry, that they had to split getting gas by the license plate you had. Even #'d plates (last number) could only get gas on even numbered days. Same goes for odd. Zero is an even number (don't even know why that was even an issue) and custom plates were considered odd.
Guess that goes without saying.
Luckily for me, I filled up on the Sunday before Sandy, so I was good. My cousin would make the trip down to Pennsylvania with his girlfriend just to avoid the fuss and the wait. Which is a good idea considering everyone around here would probably sell their own child just to get further up in the gas line. So many reports where people would get into fights about gas. This is all just from not having it for a couple of days. I understand gas is necessary for work and getting where you need to be. Imagine if we had gone without food and water. This place would be a mess. Instead of trying to be civilized and ration anything we have out, we have to fight for it like a pack of wild dogs. I digress...

We had saw that a couple of electricians were working on the power line across the street from where my cousin lived. That's always a good sign. I took the liberty to finish up my game of OoT (in record time). After the shower and the welcoming we had gone back to the house where we started throwing away even more stuff. Did the usual night in and when we awoke, we got the call that our cousin got his power back. Celebrations were had. I believe by then it was Friday/Saturday so I spent that night drinking a bit and taking in all my charged electronics and heated rooms and just all around luxury.

I fell asleep after a viewing of The Avengers, and had a warm sofa to sleep into. It was amazing. By then I had learned that work and school were going to be a thing following that Monday. The extra commute didn't bother me so much, at least we had electricity. Things went on as normal, but it soon became bittersweet. When the rest of my family started staying at my cousins, it became a little too crowded and a little too loud. During bedtime especially. BECAUSE OF ALL THE GODDAMN SNORING. Ok yes I am guilty of snoring from time to time, but this was a whole new level of snoring. It was like hearing a Snorlax orgy with Thomas the Tank Engine anally raping Optimus Prime. Barely got any rest that week. I had an arsenal of throw pillows at my side to chuck at the offender if it got too loud.

"Joo betta knock dat shit off  Jamal or u aint gettin dark chocolate tonight."
Our family had waited a total of 10 days to get the power back to our house. By then some of our fish died, our banana trees wilted, all our food gone. Trees were fallen, sidings were blown away. It was worse because there was another storm, a snow storm that hit during the process. Delayed the power even longer. By the time were out of it, there was just a lot to take in, and little time to do so. Eventually everything went back to normal. Some people to this day are still recovering (and this post took me weeks to type up). I wanted to write this out not only to remember the experience but to offer my opinion about something.

You always see commercials for disaster relief donations, and I bet you always think twice about making a donation, and whether you do or don't you'll get a different perspective out of it when you are part of the disaster. I get that my experience wasn't the worst of it by far, but it really gives you a new way to look at situations like this. I have to admit though, as I was listening to the radio I was starting to get annoyed. The station had made it known to everyone that they were going to help with cleanup and things. Donations obviously greatly appreciated. They had asked people to call in and see what they needed - blankets, trash bags, etc. That's all well and dandy and I'm sure they were happy to help. I was ok with everything until one lady called in. Instead of sounding like she was asking for it, it almost seemed like she was demanding it.

"We need blankets, we need bags, we need diapers, we need food - but nothing in cans cuz we ain't got nothing to open it with..." blah blah and more of that. I'm like bitch, you are gonna take what you get and you'll appreciate it. I get that you need help, just be humble about it. You're lucky to even have someone listening, cuz I would drive by your area, look at it, comment about how bad it is, and just move right along.

That'll buff riiiiight out...
We needed to change the windows anyway.. and the door... and the roof.
And well - ... you know this one's your problem.
I'm just saying to appreciate what you have left, and be thankful for what help you're receiving. This hurricane really put that into perspective for me. It was a long strange journey... but it was definitely an experience. It'll show what things you hold as a priority. It'll show how much other people care about you. It'll show life and society for what it really is on the inside - good and bad. Live for the moment, cuz you don't know what's coming your way.

Whatta bitch
ta ta kids
on Thursday, November 8, 2012
You know what I'm talking about. From here on out this post is nothing but a little of bit of tough love, and some understanding on everyones part. I need some patience from everyone, because the things I plan to say may seem harsh, but as previously stated, needs some understanding. Let's talk real quick about what beauty is: different from everyone. Who I find attractive may be extremely different from who you find attractive and that's the beauty of human nature. You could be ugly as sin, but let me tell you ugly person - someone is going to find your ugly butt incredibly attractive.
Pictured: Beauty
(to someone) ... right? ... anyone?
Alright, it's time to real talk - what I came here for. I've been in a very bloggy mood lately, and I'm glad I have a lot to say. Theres a hurricane sandy one coming up, but let's wait until I have water and power back. *sigh ... but I digress. Looking through some popular pictures on instagram, I came across a picture of a fairly young girl, with a shaved head. Looking through the comments I'm seeing a majority of "OMG you're so beautiful." For one reason or another my mind automatically thinks, "there's something wrong with this chick." Horrible thing to say, right? But wouldn't you know it, she's got cancer. Before sh*t hits the fan, you should know that I was scrolling through the comments and I found one brave (or ignorant) soul that managed to leave this spicy comment: "wtf you're so UGLY." Boy did he hear it from everyone. In here lies the problem...

Apparently the imaginary line for beauty doesn't exist after some point. I understand that with chemo, amputees, bad scars, burns, etc  it can really deform your face or appearance. With  women especially it probably takes a huge hit on their confidence/psyche. The last thing that person needs is someone to call them ugly. I mean, come on... it's bad enough that they've gone through so much you don't have to remind them that right now isn't their best looking state. That's the argument for the defense here. Everyone jumping on the CANCER bandwagon (including me) telling this person off for being so insensitive. I'm jumping on here and not in the instagram comments, because my scumbag-brain suddenly has this thought:
fo 'real doe she ain't dat good lookin.
WTF brain?!?! ... and that's when I decided to write about the topic. This brave soul, most likely had no idea - like me at first - that this girl had a condition. He expresses his opinion like everyone else on the internet. My problem with this is that your average everyday people - even me - get called ugly sometimes... most times... whatever. But since your average everyday person - like me - doesn't have a condition then it becomes ok to follow through with this opinion, and have other support it. I took a look at this girl. She COULD be pretty, with hair. That's just the cold hard truth. Since I assume the chemo has affected her hair, then she has needed to shave it and I'm going to go ahead and say it's not a good look for her. Obviously though she can own up to it and wear it with both pride and confidence. I guess it's in there where her beauty shines through. From a physical d-bag standpoint, she's not really the best out of the bunch.

What I'm trying to get at here is that when knowing if a person is suffering from some tragedy that affects they way someone looks, we help maintain their psyche and confidence by always reminding them how strong and - especially if they're a girl - BEAUTFUL they are by saying so. I have an idea what girls are like, they'll always say someone or something that person is wearing is pretty and will turn to her friends and instantly take it back after the moment passes. I wonder if these people proclaiming beauty actually mean it, or if they just use it as a comforting lie to maintain peace...

I'd lilke to end by saying the person calling the cancer patient ugly was in no way wrong (however mean it was). HOWEVER, in that particualr situation with a public forum, you might want to keep to yourself first.

ta ta kids
on Wednesday, November 7, 2012
So unless you're living under a rock, you've probably already checked to see who won the election. I'd like to remind everyone that I still don't really know what I'm talking about in terms of politics or anything, so if I get anything wrong (and I probably will) please feel free to POLITELY educate me. I don't really think I'll go down into the nitty-gritty, I just wanted to express my opinion on the results. DISCLAIMER: I don't really affiliate with any political party. I don't know the issues, the people behind the issues, etc. I neither hate nor like obama, and same goes with romney. I don't even care to capitalize their names. I will from now on though. Promise.

So when you google election results, you're greeted with news stating Obama was re-elected and then you take a scan at the numbers. 50% to 48%. (Yes I know it's 98%... I think something happened in Florida... something always happens in Florida)

What a dick.
I'm all for majority rules and stuff, but when choosing the leader of our country... I think it should probably be a little more one-sided than 50:48, don't you? I know it goes without saying, but if you had 100 people in a room, 50 would want Obama, and 48 would want Romney. I guess I'll be part of the leftovers. If you upscale that number to USA size... we're talking a pretty undecided country here. I know there's a lot of number crunching involved, about which states have more electoral votes, if each voted is weighted differently based on population... a lot of stuff a normal person doesn't have time for. I'm just looking at it from the surface, 50 to 48. It just doesn't do it for me for some reason. I hope I'm not the only one who thinks so. Even worse, when you look at the breakdown by state, Obama took 25 states to Romneys 24. And Florida was grey becasue it's a little bitch.

Thanks to some fine print in the rules that basically gives more "pull" towards more populous or whatever states then Obama was able to win. So where does that really leave America? With a leader that technically only kinda half wants him there. At least that's the way I see it.

Again, I'm neither pro or anti Obama. I want a President who can impact my life. Maybe I'm still too young to understand, but I don't think my life would change 4 years ago with McCain, nor do I think it will change 4 years from now with anyone else. I'm still going to pay my taxes, fill up my gas tank, go to work, raise a family and do what I can to get by. Sure I'll complain about how high gas is, how much is getting taken away from my paycheck... but what is there that I can do? I can't run up to Obama, slap him in the face and demand lower gas prices.
Who could argue with that face?
America surely is the land of the free, but the most important group of people lack a voice. The voice comes from a rep who has already been jaded with his power. Like I said previously, ultimately it doesn't freaking matter. No one normal working-man voice is going to change anything. Suck it up and move on with your life.
on Tuesday, November 6, 2012
Lay it out on the table first. I don't really have a lot of knowledge on how America works when it comes to politics and elections. I did take a high school history class, and they did teach me... but if I actually cared I would remember. So know that from here on out, I'm just kind of talking out of what I know. Please feel free to educate me, but in a educating manner. Don't get on your soap box and start preaching what I should and should not do. Thanks much! Now without further ado...

I don't vote. I don't know if I ever will vote. I understand that voting is one of the rights we have as free Americans and we should practice that right for "the good of our nation" and all that patriotic bull crap, but when it really comes down to it... does it really matter? Does my vote, the one with my name on it... does it really matter if I put it into the slot or not? Does it matter if I send it in? Here's a quick understanding of how I think this whole electing our president goes. I remember it being clearer when Obama got his first term but now I guess it's a little more fuzzy.

So each state has some kind of representative that indicates whether or not it's going to be Republican or Democrat. From these reps, the bigger guys see where the country is leaning toward and make a decision based on there own decision. And the majority wins. Bigger states have more votes in the Electoral College. I believe NJ has 14 this year (after looking it up). Anywho, if it's tied, then it goes to the house and then my voice is heard even less. My question is, where does my vote matter? I'm aware that people in the electoral college pledge to vote based on popularity, but it seems (at least in NJ) that we're going to go Democrat, whether I vote or not. So again I ask, what does it matter?

Maybe I'm too young to see the impact of a new/returning president. I think someone needs to physically show me that my vote matters in order for me to get up and actually do it. I've had a huge problem with the "voice of the people" ever since the occupy movements. Mainly - we ultimately don't have one. Countrywide, people were protesting and bitching about the 1% instead of actually going to work and doing something and, yes, it DID get media attention and it did inspire some people. However, what was the outcome? People were pepper sprayed and sent to jail thinking they were standing up for a good cause, and yet there isn't anything to show for it. Seeing all of this unfold it's not that hard to see that even if a mass group of people come together for one cause... if any one of the "big guys" doesn't want change to happen, it won't happen.

For me that goes with this whole election scheme. People are given the illusion of power, when the ballots are probably connected directly into a paper shredder. This country has already elected it's president, MONTHS maybe YEARS ago. I firmly believe we have no say in who gets to be put in a future Social Studies textbook. If I'm wrong, then I'll be happy to listen as to why.

On another note, I just visited doesmyvotematter.org. When I selected my state, "Assuming 3,868,237 people vote in New Jersey, the chance of your vote mattering is 1 in 17 Billion." 17 Billion. That's not enough of an argument to even consider voting. It goes on to explain why, and it's exactly as I put. Unless we're a hugely contested "swing state" then most likely the state is going to vote the way it's always voted. NJ has voted Democrat in the last 5 elections. So there.

Some people are happy to vote, and I'm not going to convince you not to. Just know where I stand. It really doesn't matter.

ta ta kids.