>_< Sacrifice

There's a lot to be said about those who sacrfice anything for others. In the most extreme case, usually one person sacrfices their own life to save another. Going down in levels you might find someone sacrificing a kidney, or another organ to save a life. These types of sacrifices are truly heroic in their own right. Although some of us may not have the courage to make such big sacrifices, it doesn't necessarily mean we're not as heroic. Sacrifice comes in various degrees of heroism. We don't have that many kidneys (or lives for that matter) to donate or give away. Many of us though take something we all have plenty of and sacrifice it when needed: time. I feel like time is one of the easiest things to sacrifice, especially if its worth it. In certain cases, it might mean just as much as a kidney. Now I'm probably not going to go incredibly emotional into this blog, however always keep some of the things I say in mind so that maybe we can all get something out of this. Maybe.

The reason why I decided to blog about sacrifice mainly lies in the events of this morning. A dear family member of mine had needed a ride to work, which required a wake up time for me an hour or so earlier (not counting the snooze button). It was a bit irritating getting woken up earlier than necessary. As I mumbled my way through a quick conversation I began thinking how pissed I was that I didn't any extra sleep. So as I lay in my bed I had thought of this thing we call sacrifice, and all the things this family member sacrificed for me for all those years was just running through my head. Now I had done this kind of thing before, dropping said member to work, many times. Though I realize that it doesn't really make up for the tings that were sacrificed for me in order to keep me happy. I think that to myself every time I had to wake up early to drop them off work. So I get up, hit the shower, got ready for work, took them to work, and went on with the rest of my day. It's a boring story, I know, but it meant a little more to me than it probably should've. That's probably why I'm deciding to type about it. I just want to ask a general question. What does sacrifice mean to you?

The best definition of sacrifice is this: “To forfeit something for something else considered to have a greater value.” (American Heritage Dictionary). Sacrifice does not mean giving up something for nothing; it means giving up one thing for something else we believe is worth more. This does not at all take away from the virtue of sacrificial acts. Instead of locating the merit of sacrifice in unselfishness, we can find it in a man’s chosen value system. The man who lays down his life for his family or for his comrades has chosen to place more value on their lives than on his own. What is more praiseworthy than that?

I didn't receive anything directly by getting up early and bringing them to work. But the greater value in this case is showing them that as family I still love them and am still willing to do these things, no matter how much it annoys me. That they can always count on me if they need anything.


The greatest gift of love is not what someone is willing to give, but what someone is willing to give up. True sacrifice.

ta ta kids

>_< Something to Type About (9)

What a glorious day to be typing a blog about anything that passes my mind. There is a certain type of environment in this lab right now that leads me to believe that not only will I enjoy this day, but I am going to enjoy typing throughout  the day also. Looking back at yesterdays post, I was really happy how well that turned out. I wish I had the mind to edit my posts and really make them worth while, but for now I think I'll stick with the super casual status, silly little typos, and just having an all around good time. I am only human and this is just something that I might look back later on. Let's get started, shall we?

(8:13AM) Why do I do this? This whole blog thing? If you look through the archives, you can clearly see that I had previously only done this about once a month, and then went on super hiatus for gosh knows how long. To be honest, this whole blog is just to keep my typing and essay-type writing on check. It's true that I'm not writing essays on here, but its nice writing every one in awhile especially when you aren't in school. I don't want to be able to lose my ability to convey my thoughts digitally or on paper. I did have a good idea just now. Maybe one day I'll google an essay topic and write an essay on here. Take it really seriously, as if I was being graded. I'd like to see how that turns out. Don't grade me though. For the past 3 years or so, after taking a general requirement of English classes, the only thing I've been writing are lab reports. I always took pride in writing those. Though their structures differ greatly from normal essays, and that I'm sure is fairly obvious. I digress... so yea let's get an essay on here one day, yes?

(9:10AM) One of the worst feelings I get is the feeling when I disappoint someone or some people. Specifically volleyball. When theres a play that needs to be made, or a point that needs to be one, I take some pride, in being an outside hitter, to be able to put the ball down, or to make a place to try and turn whatever slump we're in around. Now this puts a decent amount of pressure on me, and I'm completely fine with that, but sometimes theres a small chance when I take a look at my opposition and I decide, holy crap this guy is WAY to tall for me to hit over. So either I cut it, ot decide to tool it off the block. No big deal. When I can't pull through for my teammates, and especially my setter, I really don't like the feeling. It's funny how I elude to volleyball because there are instances outside of volleyball where I disappoint. Let's not into that though. It's just that it's really hard to come back out of an emotional slump and even though some people can shake it off, I feel like that their disappointment in me just kind of looms in the air. I always try and keep a positive attitude about things, so when the next opportunity comes around I really want to gain back the energy lost. Which in turn makes me a better player in the end. I have no idea how that paragraph turned out. I have a hunch that theres a lot of incoherent phrases just stuck together. Oh well.

(3:04PM) There's been a change in the level of hecticness as of recent, and it really is a shame because I feel that I did have a lot on my mind, but nowhere to type them out on. I'm sure it wasn't too important, but for right now I'm feeling a sense of confusion, frustration, and even some bitterness. My time at this part of the company is slowly coming to a close, and even though I knew this already its becoming more apparent now. I'm not really that important when it comes to this company. People come and go all the time, and they are replaced just as fast as they left. It's a real shame because I've said numerous times here that I truly felt appreciated here. Now that it's all almost over, I'm starting to see what the real world is actually like in terms of a money making business. Hopefully I've made a good enough impact in this place so the next person up at bat can see what kind of legacy I left here. But with every door closed, a new door is open and hopefully I'll be able to start a new life, with a higher pay, and a new floor to work on. I'll fill in all the details when the time comes. All the other negative feelings are just coming from how incredibly slow my office computer is. I hate to say it, but I've become impatient at some of the things my office computer does. It's practically brand new, it shouldn't be operating this slow and yet it moves at a snails pace. It's terrible. I've become so accustomed to fast Internet speeds that anything closer is just a teeny bit aggravating. I like to think of myself a patient person, but this is just ridiculous.

And with that I believe the typing might have to come to a close. I don't have much more time in the workday and I highly doubt I'll get to spend it ranting about anything else that crosses my mind. All I know is that in the coming months my life is going to start speeding up. I do't want to feel like I'm growing up too fast. I still want to enjoy being me. But when is the perfect time to just realize you need to buckle down? I mis shaving someones hand to hold onto as they lead me in the right direction. Almost every choice is starting to become my own. Its thrilling, but I'm starting to get scared.

ta ta kids

>_< Hold the Door.

I know what you're thinking. This is probably going to be about something else. Just because the title says something about holding doors, doesn't mean this is going to be a blog about holding doors. Oh wait, its totally a blog about holding doors. It is after all a pretty serious issue in society today. I think we just need to clear up what needs to be done when holding the doors for someone, and also in the other spectrum where a door is being held for you. Theres a fair amount of mystery to tackle on the subject, and it certainly is relatable to some extent. Why, the door was held for me just this morning! Seriously, we can do this. I promise it'll be fun, or at the very least insightful.

Let's start with the basics. 1 door. 2 people. You're walking behind someone as you approach a door. Both of you are aware of each others presence, which completely puts the whole situation in motion. The stranger in front (generally speaking) is probably going to hold the door for you. As that time approaches, everything goes rather swimmingly, as the person in front PULLS the door open, walks through the door, keeps the arm extended behind him as you catch the door and say thanks. They say something along the lines of "you're welcome," "yup," "not problem," etc. You both continue on your separate ways. I believe that's the most common situation for door holding. Incredibly informal, but the good deed has been done. Make sure to properly thank the person, loud enough so they can hear you. That's all. Variations? What if the person decided to pull the door open FOR you, instead of walking straight through? You owe this person a thank you. They are now a couple steps behind schedule and they have you to blame for it. Make sure to sound sincere, smile, and keep eye contact.

Time to mix it up. You're in front now. The door will be PULLED. I believe the impact is much better when you open the door for someone, instead of walking through and holding it open from behind. It really depends where you are. Malls, schools, and other casual locations can probably withstand the walking through approach. Work, business buildings, hotels, and the like would probably call for you stepping aside and opening the door for the person behind you. Always look like you want to do it, not because you've been trapped into this awkward social situation. Also, remember that you're doing this out of your own volition, so don't expect a thank you or any type of reward. Most likely you'll get one, but don't be pissed that you don't. You didn't have to open the door, but you did it because you're an upstanding citizen.

I keep capitalizing PULLED because some doors, as most of you know, can be pushed. The game changes are slight in this variable. If a person in front PUSHES the door open, a couple situations may be set into motion. Most likely, they will quickly asses the distance between both parties (and we'll get more into that in a bit) and will either: continue to hold the door for you if the distance is medium or far... OR they will apply an excessive amount of force so that the door swings more open and will most likely still be in an acceptable position for you to also go through. It goes without saying that the latter situation doesn't need a thank you. Like previous situations, incredibly informal. Had said person held said door for you while still facing the direction he was going, the same rules would apply as a PULLED door. If you're leading, your location can determine the appropriate action. Always hold the door in a more formal place. Also, old people. If you truly want to get fancy on a PUSHED door, you can always hold the door with your back, and allow the person behind you to walk on by. Maintain a genuine smile and eye contact and be on your way. Also, high five.

Fancy time. 2 people. 2 doors. I'm talking one right after the other. This is a two step process. You can refer to our previous situations for the first door, all rules apply. The second door. This is where it gets really awkward. I feel that people don't seem to know how to go about the second door. Here are some IF/THEN situations. If you held the door the first time around, then anything can happen to the second door. You are no longer in control of the situation after that point. If person held the second door as a return of favor, kindly thank him and share a small chortle and go about your way. If the door was held for you the first time, it is customary to hold the second door for them. Easy as that. I think you should just switch roles. We assume that these doors were held in a way that the roles would be switched the next time around. What if the first time around the door was held so that the person in the lead were to stay in the lead? The second door is now in the same control. Honestly, play that by ear. If you didn't thank the person the first time, make sure to do so the second time. I think it's really awkward thanking a person twice.

dont be creepy.

Let's get into distance. For visual enhancements please refer to the picture above. All the previous scenarios involve both parties being relatively close to each other. "Hold  the door" type distance. Please don't force people into an awkward walk/run if you hold the door for someone who is about 20-30 feet away from you. I know you've been in the situation, it's one of the most awkward feelings to start to run only to immediately go at a speed that's kind of the same as your walking speed, but only it looks like you're attempting to gratefully acknowledge the now only half good deed a stranger has done for you.

CURVE BALL! What about a rotating door? Well, if it's automatic, then no work is necessary. Just watch out. Unless theres obvious room for two, there isn't. If it's a manual, don't push too fast. In fact, you'll find that if done right, theres probably going to be some equal force for both parties and the door should move easily.

Obviously there's no set rule. We are free to do whatever we want and if thats the case you might as well just not hold the door for anyone anymore. Jerk.

Also, I can't believe I just wrote a blog about this.

ta ta kids

>_< Something to Type About (8)

A relaxing week for the most part... except the wicked Wednesdays where I'm usually too tired to function. Though now that is all coming to a close, its time to do another one of these fun little things. I don't really know how work will be today, depending on whether or not I decide to knock off all the important things right now or save them for later? Or maybe I should spread them out during the day. Either way I'm sure there will be some time to ramble about some meaningful/meaningless things.

(7:55AM) Starting with right now. What do you do when your phone goes off during an intimate session? A survey done by Virgin mobile said 55% of people wouldn't answer it. That's good I guess. But that leaves pretty much half of the other people saying they would. Which is kind of troublesome to say the least. If it was an urgent call it would be just that: a call... maybe multiple times back to back. But a text message is definitely something that can wait. There are much more important things at hand... in more ways than one. Try to keep your phone in the other room or turn it off if theres a possibly of getting some. There are some exciting stories that are truly a bone kill if I could ever relate to them. Actually, I might recall doing the same... but as a joke... and it was a quick call anyway... so actually I'm a hypocrite. Moving right along...

(8:38AM) Best joke ever today: how do 5 gay guys walk together? In ONE DIRECTION. ZING! Here is a runner up: Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.... people are funny
(10:19AM) So I just spent the last hour or so doing all the work I could've spread out throughout the day. Good news is I can kind of relax. Bad news is I have no idea how I'm going to spend the rest of the day looking like I'm actually working. I mean I guess this one little typing session will slide since it's kind of like a mini break. So what's your opinion of seeing a movie twice? About a decade ago movies used to be so cheap, about $7 a person. Which is pretty incredible. Now I wasn't that much of an avid movie goer back then so I didn't really take advantage of that situation. Nowadays I'm a decent fan of movies, only going when I really want to catch one. Where I am, movie prices are about $10.50 or $11. For IMAX? A little under $20. That's a little ridiculous. Since then I've only seen and paid for one movie twice: Wall-E. It's Wall-E though, that's perfectly fine. That was probably when movies were about $9.50 or $10. Now I don't really see myself going to a movie a second time, even if it's for the experience. Especially if it's a date one of the times. That's nearly $40 down the drain, which can be easily spent on seeing a movie once, and having dinner after. I find it kind of ironic because I'm pretty sure that I'll be going to see The Avengers a second time. But come on... THE AVENGERS.

(1:36PM) There hasn't been much change when it comes to lunch rooms. I'm not talking specifically about the food or anything, but even at work, with grown men and women... the lunch room is a social shark pool. I can't believe that even among a successful company like us, that there would still be petty differences amongst co-workers. Having read that out loud I guess maybe I'm not as surprised when I was about an hour ago. I guess people will be people, and no one can like or be liked by everybody. Though I still do think that adults would be grown and mature enough to not make it so... obvious. I've already heard some back and forths between two different parties, and you could swear that it's just like high school again. Something truly amazing is probably happeneing in your lunch room right now, if you have one.

That's it for today. Theres some banter about meet-ups and things to the left of me right now. I guess something about letting people know if people can't make it or not. And priorities. Actually I'm doing two things at once so I can't really concentrate. I just wanna get out of here. Also they are wondering how to spell easel. We're silly.

(3:26PM) ta ta kids

>_< Something to Type About (7)

I know I missed the last week, but that's only because I had called in sick from work. So bear with me. I don't believe that I'll be doing any catching up either since the last half of this work week have been nothing but hectic. Even still it's 8:30 AM and I've only begun to type this up now... so don't be surprised if I've left you all unsatisfied... but let's face it there isn't a lot of you here anyway.

(10:09AM) I've been getting the taste of the true professional world this week. I was in a presidential conference room. The chairs were like single person sofas. Refreshments... and the most odd part for me was how everyone traded business cards. Its not weird now that I look back at it, but as I saw it happen in front of my face it just reminded me of the times I sat around with my friends trading pokemon cards and what not. I even pictured some of my colleagues in a younger form to humour myself. I was asked even for my business card, but unfortunately I don't have any available at this time. Another little thing that happened is that we all took turns presenting ourselves and I was one of the youngest with the least amount of things to say. Everyone went around saying they have their PhDs in whatever and had worked at these companies for this amount of years. I felt really lacking and super undeserving for even being in the same room with a lot of great minds. It just drove me to want more as a chemist. More knowledge, more experience, so that maybe one day I'll actually have something worthwhile to say when another time like that comes. It was a great experience, and I got to meet a lot of interesting people. Kind of like a wake up slap to the face saying "YOU NEED TO BE ONE OF THEM!" One day... one day...

(11:22AM) With all these tours and things going on around here I find it surprising that I actually do have some time to type about a couple things on my mind. Perhaps all the hecticness will come in waves instead of all at once. Either way I wanted to type about a recent purchase of mine. I recently bought a pair of glasses, blank ones, just for the sake of accessorizing. I personally feel that it gives me another layer of intelligence, and even seriousness when I wear them. The best part is they were really cheap and over the sake of the next couple months I'll probably be purchasing them in different colors, just so I can match with whatever outfit I'm wearing. I think it's really cool how the times have shifted, because growing up (and maybe a little before that) being that nerd with glasses was a one way ticket to bullyville. The rise of hipster and nerd culture has actually turned glasses into something useful in pop culture. I know a lot of people who would probably criticize me for getting them in the first place, but to that I have to say... if I believe they look good and I feel more confident wearing them, then why shouldn't I? My own sister said that yes they are good, but the idea behind them is a little silly. I actually purchased these glasses because all of my immediate family wears them I totally felt left out. If you really want to see them theres a picture up on my instagram @blueftb00by.

(1:15PM) Again, after all this time I can still manage to type. In actuality though, typing all this doesn't REALLY take up a lot of my day here. I mean these little paragraphs take about 5-10 minutes to type up unless I get really into it. Other than that it's just a tool to get some topics if my chest if I had any. It's nice to blog casually about whatever though. I've been trying to get a little more independent in the workplace. There are some samples that come in that I can absolutely take and weight out and run as if I had worked here for years. There are some other samples however, that require some thought in methods used. I want to be able to really know what I'm doing without ever having to double check with my higher up to see if I did it right. For example (without getting to into chemistry) ... theres this sample I'm currently staring at that I do have the time to run. I have a hunch of what experiment it is and under what conditions it should be run in. Something tells me I could be wrong though. As I'm typing this sentence however, I'm beginning to think that I probably can do this. But generally speaking thats the kind of thing I have to deal with concerning other samples. Sorry if it didn't make any sense. I'm really starting to get the feel of this place and it's going to be sad if and when I have to go.

(3:23PM) I've said it before and I'll say it again. The biggest reason why I enjoy working here is becasue of all the appreciation I get. Whether or not its generic, or true to the words, it does make me feel real special. I'm looking forward to the weekend. Another one to relax into... and before you know it I'll be back here Monday at 7 AM. What about the weekend makes it seem so fast? I think the worst part will be hearing that most of the college kids are finishing up their finals and now I have to listen as they enjoy their summer and I have to sit here and work. Also, theres a cake in my coworkers room that I'm supposed to get rid of. I really don't want to do so. Maybe I'll take another slice before heading off. Not much to type about this time around.. nothing worth reading I suppose. Maybe next time will be better.

ta ta kids