>_< Something to 5 About

Now it's not even making sense. Theres nothing worse than titles that don't make sense! And sentances that don't end the way you expect them octopus. That's right. Sentence fragments are comedy now. So let's just slowly deal with all this new stuff we've learned and do what we came here to do. I type about random things to get the work day flowing more aggressively. And whoever wants to read... by all means go ahead. It's going to be a little hectic at works today, but I'm sure I can still squeeze a few topics in. Starting with...

(9:03AM) A dilemma had occured between a group of people and their co-workers. Apparently 2 of them were going to have a wedding that took place on the same day. An employee of less than a year had given the "save the dates" for her wedding earlier than an employee of 3 years. The problem here is that the group of people can't decide on which wedding to attend. Should they go to the less than a year employee because she sent her "save the dates" out first? Or should they attend the 3 year employee out of his seniority with the company? They went through some suggestions and the only logical one that came up was one that stated that they draw the persons name of whose wedding they're going to out of a hat. Half will go to one, and half will go to the other at random. I believe that's fair... the most fair without me thinking of any ideas. To further their discussion, they wanted the two to concinve them to go to their own respective weddings by stating what food and entertainment they were going to have. What was a little disappointing was that they were leaning towards the 3 year employee because he had seemingly better food and entertainment. It's disappointing to me because right off that bat if I had to make a quick choice I would go to the less than a year employee because she sent out her invitations first. Her wedding was not only made to look boring, a majority of her coworkers were praising the other wedding just a little too much, and I felt some remorse for her. Their co-workers are terrible people for even trying to get the two to compete for better weddings. If they were your true friends, the first solution would be the best solution, no further discussion. Listening to the co-workers bickering about how one was going to be better than the other really put a thorn on my side because you could tell that the recent employee was getting her feelings hurt. It's a shame really.

(11:54AM) Before I head over to lunch, I want to make a note that the past few days of work have been pretty exhausting. It's good and bad in a way, although I'd much rather perfer work on a simmer as opposed to boiling. Cooking analogies. Swing and a miss. If I could see any positives in all this mayhem, it would have to be in the fact that even through all this work related stress, I can overcome. Remember to prioritize and organize. Take things one step at a time becasue - especially in the professional setting - trying to do everything at once can lead to costly errors. It's really stomach churning when you find out that 3 hours into an experiement something went wrong and you have to start the WHOLE THING OVER. Not a good feel bro.

(3:13pm) As stated earlier, a pretty busy day. It should mellow out the next week though since all this sample prep is done for now. Anyway I came across a topic, and we'll strip the politics away from this because I absolutely hate politics. Now we all know that being a mother can be a full time job, especially with 3 or more kids (I feel). What I came across is a mother of 5, and someone expressing their opinion about how she never worked a day of her life becasue she married a wealthy politician. She defends herself by stating that being a mother of 5 is a full time job, with that someone saying that being wealthy takes a lot of weight of raising children as some reports indicate the family hiring nanny's and maids to do their bidding. So that's where the issue lies. I believe it does become less of a hassle raising 5 children when you are well to do. Compare raising 5 children in the "ghetto" to raising 5 children with money and other luxuries... especially with nannies and maids. A lot of the hardships of being a mother (not that I would know but I hear my own mother complaining about it) is the cooking and the cleaning. Take that away then all that's left is to watch the kids as they explore and experience the world around them. Now I don't know what the ages on her children are, but the main point I'm trying to make here is that she's got it a WHOLE lot easier than most mothers in the US do. So I think she should get a job or something. Goldigger.

Phew, I can't believe I even had time to rant about a couple of things. Hopefully I'll get more time in the future, becasue I feel like I have a lot on my mind, but I can't express them and it just gets wasted...

ta ta kids

>_< The Perfect Man

I've mentioned countless times about how I listen to the local morning show during my commute to work. Although I find all of them very annoying, the topics they bring up can sometimes set my emotions for a wild ride. There are just so many things I think about and want to say over the air, but I know I'd never get through, and the way they are I'm sure they'd find a way to make me look like an idiot or a bad guy, unless of course they completely agree with me. But I digress... So basically the one of the topics today was a recent article surveying 2,000 women about "the perfect man." Now already I'm dying to hear what they come up with, and as a human I find myself competing against this list to see if I fit these standards. Let's go over the some of the basic non-threatening ones, or at least the ones I remember.

The perfect man is, on average, 6 feet tall. That's pretty much all the ones that are non-threatening. Although I still have a problem with it. What this show fails to do on numerous occasions is see the opinions in a completely different light. In fact, for all the males that listen to that show, and I assume many do, this list creates the exact issue women face throughout their entire lives. It's an issue of self-confidence. It's been going on for years: beautiful women portrayed on the big screen, in magazines, on the runway, eetc. It opens countless doors to depression and illnesses to young women who seek to become "one of them." Now society has caught onto this idea and finally boarded quickly enough to cash in on a "you're beautiful just the way you are" campaign to increase product sales for certain companies. I understand that the world, and especially America, is getting fat. You don't need to keep changing the standards of beauty everytime McDonalds releases a new sandwich. All we need is a little self-humility. Understand the condition you're in and work hard to change it, or learn to accept it. I'm veering off into a direction I don't really want to go to so let's get back on track.

This "perfect man" list is going to do the same for men everywhere, allowing them to manipulate their lifestyle in order to suit the opinions of 2,000 random women. Everyone is different, everyone falls in love differently. Maintain who you want to be and seek those who appreciate just that. Some of the things on this list is ridiculous. The perfect man should watch football whe watching a sport. The perfect man should watch reality TV. The perfect man must be clean shaven, make at least $76K a year, must call their mom once a week... and the list goes on. The list is incredibly shallow and fails to mention anything about personality or emotional attraction. It shines a light on the outside and fails to get to know the man on the inside. I believe what really got me steamed were the women calling in on their own ideas of the perfect man.

This "catch" explained that the perfect man should know how to make a drink. Hard drinks. She states that "if it ain't hard it ain't gonna be a good night." Absolutely terrible. I wish many miscarriages on this woman. Next on the list was your stereotypical black woman stating "my man ain't gonna be no momma's boy, he gotta have his own house, and a J-O-B." Also I assume there was a Z-snap in there somewhere. I also assumed she actually knew that she spelled "job." I stopped listening after that. Point is, you're creating a whole new batch of unconfident, self-concious males out there who probably have a lot to offer, but won't be able to try because of the new standard you've given us.

How do I compare to that list? What does it matter? We should be able to establish a connection without knowing the details, and then maybe I'll go up against the list after a few nights out. If I fail and you decide you want out, then you should apologize for wasting my time and for being so incredibly shallow. I am getting a little fired up, so in order to cool down (and not be so hypocritical) let's just shine that light on the other side to see what's going on.

Everyone is free to choose a partner by their own standards. This lists' purpose may not exactly be to provide a standard, but to just give a good idea on what some guys need to do in order to get some help finding a mate. Some things, like height, can't be helped... but knowing that some things apply to them may actually boost a male's confidence rather than hinder it. I guess you take this list with a grain of salt. As previously stated, we all need some self-humility. Accept your imperfections and learn to make what's really great about yourself stand out to the ones you care about.

But also, let's not all be so shallow.

ta ta kids

>_< Something FOUR Typing... About

This number pun is really taking a toll on my desire to write these types of blogs. But it sure does give me something to talk about every single time for an introduction. I'm actually starting this a little late since I've received another task at work, but I suppose it's just keeping me busy doing work... which is exactly why I started this whole series anyway. Either way I hope I come across some things I can blurb about, just becasue I've already spent half the day working. I think it's high time I chillax a bit.

(11:32AM) Didn't I tell you it was late in the day? I'm actually kinf of excited since half of this day is practically over and vacation time is right around the corner. Either way I believe its National Doctor's Day and I'm in Control Day. Nevermind about my sources, just go with me on this one. So I'd like to say Happy National Donctor's Day to all you doctors out there, and I'm not talking about the ones just in the hospitals, I'm talking about you too, Doctors of Science, Mathematics... and Art... I guess. All you PhD's should be proud to potentially make the big bucks. Hopefully I'll reach that status, but no where in the future do I see that happeneing. As for I'm in Control Day... perhaps it isn't a good time to celebrate. After all I AM at work, which is probably the least likely place to have control over anything. So I'll have to postpone the celebrations after work. I wanna go on and whine about how I don't have much control of anything else in my life, but that would be a lie. Maybe when I was a pissy teenager I could complain, but now that I'm 1/4 adult, I've got a decent amount of control in my life (again, just not in the workplace).

(3:14PM) So learned fairly recently that there are a lot of shady things going on in this company. Not so much business-wise, but people and employee wise. Without getting into too much detail (because they wouldn't really benefit anyone anyway), let's just say that I'm probably going to see some people in a different light after a couple weeks. As a back story, there are going to be some organizational changes within our group. People are moving around to ensure "optimal output for the best quality of our employed." Also, I don't know why I put that in quotes I completely made that saying up. Either way, one move that I was a tiny bit uphauled by is that my nice higher up who I am to thank for this job is moving downstairs. That makes me sad, and even more so becaue her replacement is someone I'm not too fond of, and espcially not after I heard some terrible details from another co-worker of mine. Either way I have no choice in the matter so I have to take all of this with a grain of salt. Also I don't know if I'm using that idion correctly. Things are going to be different after I come back from vacation.

(3:19PM) I can't beliee what a busy day it's been. I mean, I barely got to talk about anything remotely interesting. Only 2 - and now 3 - occasions where I actually have some time to ramble about things? Terrible. Let's just go through some news I went through during my lunch. Apparently Tim Cook of Apple is doing nicely as Apple's CEO with a 95% approval rating. Article stated that he's doing a great job in making everyone forget who Steve Jobs was. Good for him. I don't like Apple. There some backwards/used game compatablility issues with the next Gen console from Sony and Microsoft, as in there won't be any. I hate Xbox. Also I believe scanned through something that stated something about Android overtaking Windows in 2016. That's cool I guess. I'm neutral to both parties. I have an Android phone running Windows 7. So... yea just make sure whoever ends up on top provides quality products. If you haven't notcied yet, I only had time to look through the Technology section of Google news.

I think that's probably going to be my time for today. Can't believe I actually have a week off from this place. Sad that money won't be coming my way for a couple of weeks, but I think the time off is well worth it, and I guess well deserved. Plus I don't really feel like sticking around while all these changes at work are happening. I'll see how it all blows over when I get back.

(3:26PM) ta ta kids

>_< Lottery and Some Change

I didn't realize the pun in the title for a good 15 seconds. I'm a genius. Seriously. Also I've been reading Hyperbole and a Half, it has inspired me to take this blog to a whole 'nother level. One of intellectual casual humor. I find that her voice is somewhat like mine if I tried really really hard to be funny, but since I'm not a few notches down would still be kind of funny? Either way the change in this case is that I'm probably going to stop trying so hard to sound smart for you guys and just really speak the way I was taught to speak, keeping punctuation and spelling into consideration - I mean I'm not a caveman. The real story here is the lottery. It's been on my mind, and I guess everyone else's, for at least 32 hours now.

It's MegaMillions. Today it finally crossed into being worth a 500 million dollars. Before freaking out - which often most people do - take into consderation that it's absolutely an awesome idea to turn that kind of money into pennies (or at least dollar coins) and penetrate that mound like Scrooge McDuck. Also, take the lump sum after tax - which will probably leave you with about 300 million+ ish dollars. Which is none too shabby there, pirate. I've been spending a good portion of the 32 hours really wondering how I would divide the money becasue let's face it - keeping ALL the money for yourself is socially unacceptable (and if no one would judge me for it I might consder the option). I feel like I need to take record of this in case one day I do stumble upon a large lump sum of money and will soon be overcome by family and friends asking exactly what I'm going to do with it. So let's have a fun discussion while also maintaing the integrity of the blog. Quick note: this is under the assumption that I have 500 million dollars and not that crappy stack of 300 million some-odd dollars. Capiche? Oui. Also, please don't judge me on how I stingy I am with money, this is a new thing for me and I'm sure I'd make the necessary adjustments if needed. Let's call it a rough draft. Capiche? Si.

First things first: family. I would be more than comfortable to give 100-120 million to my parents. That's it. They can divide what they got with the rest of their own family members that I've never met. This includes first cousins, second cousinds, removed family members, lost uncles, found aunts, and anyone else they want to give it to. If it really becomes an issue I'd jack it up to million. My sister? She can have 20 million. Maybe more if she asks nicely. So let's say after all that I have 300 million left. Which is kind of funny because that's how much I'd ACTUALLY have after hte whole tax crap we went on about earlier.

Second: debt. Pay the house, car payments, mortgages, loans, bills, anything. My family will have a clean slate of living. My direct family. Under the roof of said family's house. No one else. Install solar panels to increase quality of life - and to make the other neighbors jealous. Sounds simple enough. I just want to make sure my parents don't have to work another day the rest of their lives. They probably wouldn't want ot anyway after all this.

Thirdly: charity. I'd probably choose the 10 most worthy charities and give them each a million dollars each, maybe half if I'm not feeling your credibility. Some charities that come to mind are water.org, the foundation to decrease world suck, something for animals, something for cancer, something for stem cell research, and a VERY small donation to my alma mater. When or if the money comes is probably when I'd hit the books and start making some seirous decisions.

Fourthly: friends. It's funny how chartiy comes before friends. I'm sure in this case there is some psychological reason why and if I tried to explain it in words it would come out like chex mix. More or less I feel like the potential to help others outweighs the satisfaction of a few choice people. Each friend of mine would get varying amounts of money based on our relationship. Actually, scratch that. Each friend is made to believe that every person is getting a flat rate amount of money. Depending on our level of friendship, I will slip more money under the table. I know this could cause a lot of problems, but fuck it I have money, I'll buy new friends. Also, that joke was a little distasteful and I hope my friends are understanding enough to realize that my better friends probably deserve more money.

Fifth...ly: Investment. Theres something primal and feral (same thing?) about humans and coming across a whole lot of money- we always want more. I'm no exception. After getting all the donations and semantics out of the way, my next step is to enlist a friend of mine in order to "flip it." Now when we were discussing this topic, he kept using the term "flip it" when talking about what he wanted to do with his money. I'm no accountant, nor am I good with money like he is, but I'm going to assume that "flipping it" means something much more than taking a stack of money and viewing the "tails" side of the paper (cuz let's face it, when you receive a wad of cash you almost always get it facing heads). It probably actually means close to doubling or even tripling the value... basically make more money. 500 million is probably enough for the rest of someones life, but after all the donations and splitting mentioned earlier, I probably only have less than 200 million left. Whether or not that's actually enough, I wouldn't take the chance seeing if it could, plus this gives an oppurtunity to give my next generations a head start. I wouldn't know the first thing about doing this so I won't go into further detail.

Lastly: myself. I did take my government mandated lunch break so I did lose track of all the awesomeness I was on when typing this post down (minus that fifth step). I'll try my best to pick up where I left off. As long as I didn't forget about any intermediate steps, the rest of the money, I'll assume I'll have less than 200 million. One of the first things I would do is buy a/some car(s). R8, Evos, Celicas, and electric cars. No more than 7, but no fewer than 1. Of course not all at one time. Actually going back to the last step, I'd probably invest in purchasing a gas station. That'd be awesome. Next I'd probably splurge on electronics and unneccesary gadgets. ThisiswhyImbroke.com comes to mind. Also, new wardrobe. Maybe I'd go on vacations for a month. Finally, I'd go back to school and iron out my career plans and just do it. Actually, I'd probably buy a kick ass drumset and start a band and try to make it big.

I'm a firm believer that if and when I win the lottery, I couldn't see myself changing in terms of personality. There are some minor lifestyle changes, sure, but I pride myself into thinking that nothing would change. I'm not buying a new house, I'm not moving to Beverly Hills, I'm staying where I am, just got a couple good cars in my driveway. Though its easy to say becasue I haven't actually been in that position. Maybe I would change, becasue all these nice things I'd get would turn me into such a snob. Gosh, I hope not. The rest of the money I'll pocket like its just casual spending money. What I fear most is when I become targeted for having money. I don't want murderers at my door, people following me wherever I go. What of the media? I'm starting to think that no amount of money is worth such a loss in privacy. Like I said, I haven't won, so I wouldn't know. We'll just have to see...

ta ta kids.

>_< Somethree to Type About

Perhaps as this little mini blog series goes on, these title puns will become increasingly horrendous, and maybe I'll just give up entirely when it goes above a certain number that no longer can be considered "pun-able." The commute to work was fine, I spent a good portion of it excited for the, but as I type, I can already feel that sensation to nap overcoming me. I'm not sure I have much to talk about this time around... but I'll find something. I always do, so let's get started!

(7:49AM) There was a talk about promise rings on the local radio show and a mojority of opinions I heard really supported the idea of one. Someday I'm going to call in and see if I can put my two cents in. Either way, the majority agrees that a promise ring is a "not now but later" type committment for couples not financially ready for an engagement ring. This is coming off news that recently a 24 year old woman was given one, and people were skeptical as to why she would receive one at such a later age (as the general consensus was that promis rings are usually seen on younger couples in high school/college). My two cents? I would love the oppurtunity to give a promise ring to a significant other, becasue I believe its an optional step in the relationship ladder a couple can choose to take if they really wanted to be committed to each other. Is it necessary? Of course not, but it does provide an extra layer of trust and love, which is a great foundation for a future engagement. The sad part in all this radio talk mostly lies in the cynical part in all of it. An argument arose stating that promise rings are more of a "here just take it and shut up" type thing. Also, promise rings are a great way to get into her pants. They even went as far to say that a promise rings symbolizes that stage that says "I'm here to keep you around until I find someone better." All I have to say to any of those opionions is that I'm sorry that you've been hurt enough times in your life that you can't take a promise ring for what it is. A promise. Though I'm not really the one to talk about promises, I believe that it's realyl unfair that some guys with good intentions get the coldest shoulder because soceity is outrun by douchebags that are looking to hurt. The message overall was clear: promise rings and what they symbolize are directly reflected on the guy that gives it to them. It doesn't matter what age you receive one in, as long as you both know that the real thing is coming one day.

(9:54AM) There's an odd phenomenon observed in today's adult world. The interest in the artwork of small children. I guess I shouldn't have gone so far as odd, but the interest that adults take in the artwork of kids is quite astonishing. There are a few safety posters outside the elevator on my floor, all made by children still in the single digits. Some good, some not so good, but all with good intentions and messages for the employees here at BASF. This isn't really my point though. There was always something I did ever since high school when looking at artwork done by students or children at the wall. Whenever I found a painting or drawing that was really good, so good that it stood out when surrounded by all the other works, I always checked the name of who created it. Low and behold 95% of the time, it was an Asian. Let's not try to make this about racism, but it's not a coincidence that the better artworks hung up by children nowadays come from an asian child. When you see stick figures and oval bodies, you can be sure its a white kid drawing. When it actually attempts to look like a person, it's probably an asian kid. I guess generally... GENERALLY (as in there are many exceptions) asians tend to be more artistic in that sense, probably due to all the anime manga art they're exposed to at a young age. I mean when all you see growing up is DBZ or anything like that, of course that's how we're going to emulate people through our drawings. Itstead of dots for eyes, asians may actually give the almond shape... with pupils! Either way it was always something I thought was interesting to me, how you (or I) could always pick out from a wall full of art, which ones were made by an asian.

(1:05PM) Let's get into racism. There's a story floating around about a black kid being gunned down by a fellow neighborhood watch person who had thought that he was being suspicious. I guess up until now he hasn't been charged with anything, I don't really know all the details but I can tell many people probably want this guy locked up, as do I. Not because theres any racism involved in this case, it's because he's a murderer. Now the media will portray this story in anyway they seem fit, but I stand by my opinion that no matter what the race, this neighborhood watch guy is a murderer, and should be charged as such. The big story lies in the question whether or not it mattered that the kid was black. By my standards, no... but to the media and society, a big HELL YEA. Because you know if this kid was white, this guy would instantly be put in jail. The people are kinda made to believe that since the kid was black, there may have been some justification to shoot him down. Apparently he was talking on the phone with his girlfriend who he informed that someone was following him. She told him to put his hood up and keep walking (which in the long run was probably not the best idea). I didn't want to get too into this becasue theres another thing to cover as I type while my instrumetn cools down. I just think he should be locked up, I don't even know why this is an issue. He shot and killed a man for doing nothing wrong. Looking suspicious? Until he pulls out a weapon he isn't bothering anyone. The guy was the one who was following him. HE was the suspicious one, HE pulled the gun out, HE shot, and HE killed. Ugh, I'm heated now. So let's go to the other spectrum of things. Theres a video that went viral a couple days ago about this black chick gettin her weave in a bunch in a college class on evolution. She asked the professor "why does evolution kill black people?" That right there is ridiculous. Everything was handled calmly (except her) and she threw the blackest fit ever. We wonder why racism and stereotyping exists. If so many people didn't fit into what we perceive them to be, it wouldn't be such an issue. To the black chick flipping out, you aren't helping your race. You are not a strong powerful black woman. You're trash and should be treated as such. I need to calm down a bit. It's a big issue. On the one hand you have a story defending the black race, and on the other you shine a light exactly on what everyone hates about black people. (but oh my gawsh you should have seen the way she be whippin her hair back an fo') The world is confused as to how to view your race.

(2:54PM) Napping is a great thing. Some might even argue that napping is an esential thing. Here at work, napping can be both, but also very dangerous. For instance, I was just taking a midday nap by accident woke up a bit later than previously expected. My higher up leaves her office for the day at 2:30 (supposedly). She walks through my office in order to leave. I "napped" from 2:15 to about 2:45. I do recall someone walking in and out of my office, but I don't think that was her. So here's hoping that my higher up didn't just walk out of her office while staring at my head tilted back eyes closed, mouth agape, and drool sliding down my face. As I was trying to calm my self down, I stumbled upon a quote which I found hilariously true. "If it's illegal for athletes to take steroids, shouldn't it be illegal for models to use photoshop?" Which I think is exactly what that industry needs right now. Real men and women that other real men and women can look up to. Not something they can paint themselves to be. Serioulsy though, best nap ever kind of.

(3:31PM) ta ta kids