>_< Day of Love

I'm going to tell you all right now that I'm not a fan. Before you start analyzing what kind of past I have with relationships or my love life in general, just please know that it wouldn't make a difference in my opinion. I could be very happy in a relationship and have positive things going on, but I could also be alone and miserable and hate everything around me and it STILL wouldn't change the way I feel about this particular day. I suppose you could stop reading becasue as of right now I feel this is going to be like one of those obligatory "I Hate Valentine's Day" posts. Though for those of you interested - mainly myself - you can delve deeper into my head.

The big thing I'm not particularty fond of about this day is the pressure that is put on everyone to impress. We've all heard and even seen actions of "medieval romance" (as I like to call it) while walking down the street or eating out for dinner. The flowers, the jewelry, the candy, and obviously the cliche proposal. To me it starts this little chain reaction where one person tries to outdo another, and if the party in question is aware that the action can't be outdone, then the pressure to just do something big overwhelms them. Especially in couples, most of us hear how hard it is as we see the pacing back and forth... "what do I get her/him?" "where should we go to dinner?" "did I make reservations?" "what if he/she doesn't like it?" Listen. You don't need to wait for a calendar holiday to step up the spice in your relationship. Everyone is already doing it. Why put the pressure on yourself to make reservations on what could be the busiest restaurant night of the year? Why go through the hassle of finding the last bag of chocolates or the last bouquet of flowers becasue your calendar says so?

My solution? Just be romantic whenever you want to be. You know what's a great day to do that? February 15th. Half off chocolate? DONE. Make any day an unwritten v-day. As long as you both want it, deserve it, need it, etc. It's annoying and a bit saddening to see those who crumble under the pressure of this day, when really they should get credit for even trying to tackle this day at all. What's worse is that talk and reputation someone gets when they don't perform. A perfect gentlemen/woman could be taken down 10 notches just because they didn't do anything on v-day. It's a shame really becasue as a society we have a preconceived notion that if someone fails on occasion its not SUCH a big deal, but fail on v-day then it becomes the biggest issue. I was listening to a talk show on my drive to work and a caller had stated that her boyfriend didn't want to do anything on v-day becasue he "doesn't really like that kind of stuff." The hosts proceeded to convince the caller to leave him, using a few choice words of persuasion. I don't really think its all that fair to judge this man as a failed romantic because of one day. They don't know much about the situation and he could be a great guy nonetheless. Just because he doesn't didn't do anything for you today doesn't rule out any of the other days he might have done something special, nor should it rule out that he might have something planned on a later date. As a couple you reserve the right to create your own boundries, do whatever romantic thing you need/want to do on what ever day you choose.

This day also comes with some other aliases. The main one that comes to mind is "Singles Awareness Day." (also I JUST NOW realized that's its an acronym for SAD) You can look a this name in both positive and negative connotations. Negatively, obviously, is that this day reminds those who don't really have anyone that they're alone and should probably find something to do before they spend the day moping. Positevely for those who celebrate the single life with outings and parties. I don't really know why this bothers me so much, but it probably has to do with the emphasis on the fact that it singles out a group of people that sadly announces that it is Singles Awareness Day and hopefully prey on those experiencing the same feeling, or baiting those willing to save. I guess I just don't enjoy reading or hearing about how "this holiday sucks and I'll be alone forever becasue nobody loves me" (though that DOES kind of make me a hypocrite, doesn't it) ... the difference between those and I is that I feel this way about Single Awareness day without having that bias of being single or involved.

Lastly, as a fellow XY chromosomed, this day really stresses us out. I've decided that whether or not I'm involved with anyone, it will be treated like a normal day. The most I would do is wear red.

ta ta kids